the person the writer of 'there was nothing' was talking about...

i was so stupid to even think we could be...
but all we'll ever be is nothing...

you made me realize everything about life...
you taught me how to be alive...
you taught me how to love again...
i just hope we could do things again...
just hang out...
i hope you're not thinking that i don't like you...
i do...
i'm just not sure if you do, too...

who am i kidding?..

there was nothing...

there was nothing...

i thought we were something...
i thought there was something...
but there was nothing...

you made me think of a lot of things...
you made me think that there's actually a chance...
but there was nothing...

we were hanging out together...
we even finished each oither's sentences...
but what was i thinking...
there was nothing...

never gonna happen...

"you will always be my friend," he said..."
i will always have your back no matter what happens,
i will never let you down..."

but what if i don't wanna be just your friend?
what if i wanna be more than that?

i guess it's never gonna happen,
'coz we're just meant to be friends forever,
nothing more and nothing less...

treat me...

you treat me as your friend...
you always help me with algebra and physics,
you always explain to me philosophy,
you always draw figures for me in geometry,
you always summarize the stories in english for me...

maybe i don't wanna be treated just as your friend...
what if i want more than that?
nah...it's impossible...

you'll never see me as
that,
coz you like her, my very best
friend...

it's easier...

it's easier to think negative than to think positive...
it's easier to think that we're all gonna die than to think that we're gonna live and then we die...
it's easier to think that you'll never talk to me than to think that you will and then you won't...
it's easier to think that you'll never see me the way i see you than to think that you like me and then you don't...
it's easier to think that we'll never have a future coz, trust me, we won't...

sometimes it's really cofusing just to think about us this way...
i think it's better not to think at all...
there will never be an "us" anyway...

yes or no?

Sometimes I stare at you, but you just don't see,
I can't help, but imagine us together, you and me...
It's fun when we talk about stupoid stuff,
Spending time everyday is just not enough...
I love it when you something that makes me giggle inside,
But sometimes I think our worlds may never collide...
I can't help, but feel insecure sometimes,
But that changes when you do a poem that rhymes...
Sometimes I think that I don't deserve to be with you,
But when you look at me, it changes my view...
"Why do you like him?" my conscience once questioned,
"Because... I don't know," I reckoned...
"Why did you ask?" I continued the interrogation,
"So you can know how you feel," replied the annoying notion...
"You don't have to know everything,
Just sit back, and you'll know the meaning..."
This conversation stopped,
But a new idea popped...

"Can you actually call what I'm feeling right now,
LOVE?"

find someone... (ate lorry!!!)

Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot,
who calls you back when you hang up on him,
who will stay awake just to watch you sleep.
Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead,
who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats,
who holds your hand in front of his friends.
Wait for the one who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you.

Wait for the one who turns to his
friends and says, "...that's her."

do you remember?

i miss you so much!!!
remember that time when i was writing something while you were secretly staring at me?
i was doing that to you, too while you weren't looking...
remember when you were singing to me, and i was covering my face?
that was because i didn't want you to see me blush...
remember that time when we planned to go somewhere, but you didn't come?
i felt really sad, i missed you...

i don't know what happened to
us...
all i know is that i love you, and
i really miss you...

guess what? i couldn't... i didn't...

racquel would always say, "he cares about you kaya!!!"
and ivanna would always agree with her...

i seriously don't know what to reply to them whenever we have this conversation...
i mean i know he does, but then i don't know how it really feels to be cared by him...
"ok," is the only reply i can say...

i realized that i seriously miss him now...
even if we see each other in school, it's just not enough...

i wanna talk to him, but i have nothing to say...
ivanna was right!
i can't say anything to him 'coz he's the only person i think of...
it's not like i can talk about him with him...

i read this story that made me think:

min-min (girl) likes din-din (guy)...
for so many years, they've been friends...
but now, they're nothing...
in those years, their friendship or love were fading...
way before, they would look at each other and not say a word and just smile...
din-din liked min-min...
then something happened...
after that, they would just hug for no reason...
then something happened...
after that, they were a little awkward already...
now, they're absolutely nothing...
they would see each other and they would always pretend that there's nothing wrong...
but there is...
they can't talk because there's nothing to say...
they can't hug because there's no time and there's no reason to...
they can't do anything...
what happened to them?

i talked to racquel about this story...
i talked to ivanna, too...
i was even crying...
i just missed him, and i could relate to the story...

i wish i just didn't do those things that i did...
i wish i could turn back time, and just hugged him forever...
i wish i could just talk to him, and not say a word...
i wish i could do all these things,

but guess what?
i couldn't... i didn't...

i still don't wanna give up...

whenever i see you,
you look for her...

whenever i say hi to you,
you turn your head the other way...

whenever i try to talk to you,
you talk about her...

what's wrong with you?
sometimes, i just wanna quit loving you!!!
but i can't coz i'm stupid!!!
i let my heart rule everything!!!
i don't use my brain at all!!!

maybe there's something wrong with me?
i will never know!!!

i just wanna know why you like her so much!!!
maybe we're just not compatible...
i liked you, and you liked me,
but then now, i'm the only one who's liking...

i don't know what happened to us...
it was like a bomb just exploded between both of us
,and affected us a lot!!!

before, we were really happy,
but now, we're all confused!!!

i'm confused!!!
i just wanna frickin' know what you're thinking!!!

every night i miss you,
and at the end, i realize that you're not missing me back...
you miss her...

i guess i just have to accept it and give up...
but i can't...

you might think i'm pathetic...
i am!!!
i'm a stupid ass falling for another stupid ass!!!
i'm already showing him how i really feel,
but he still doesn't notice it!!!
how stupid can that get!!!

i wanna get over this stupid feeling,

but i still don't wanna give
up...

but i can't coz i love him...43

shit!!! i miss him like shit!!!
why do i miss him, anyway?!!!
maybe because i see other people getting it on with each other,
and here i am, the plain jane in town!!!
i'm so annoyed, and i don't know what to do!!!
this sounds so pathetic, but this is how i feel!!!
i even made a list about him: what i hate and love about him...
i easily finished the hate part,
and i had to deeply think about the love part for them to be equal!!!
i don't even know why i love him so much!!!
yes, i said love!!!
i think i love him!!!
i think if you miss someone this much,
you can definitely say that you love that person!!!
you have no idea how much i miss him!!!
every morning, i smile because i dreamed about him!!!
every night, i think about him before i sleep,
so i dream about him!!!he's part of my cycle!!!
do you know what's more annoying?
everyone hates him!!!
everyone thinks he's a jerk!!!
here i am defending his ass!!!
i just don't think he's that kind of person!!!
he's a lot more than that...
i know he's this and that,
but maybe he can change,
or maybe we just get the wrong idea...
i don't know anymore!!!
i'm so confused!!!
everyone's against him!!!
everyone thinks i'm gonna like this other guy,
but i just seriously don't think so!!!
urgh!!!
and the stupid prom!!!
worrying what to wear, and who's gonna ask me?!!!
that's the last thing i should be thinking right now!!!
anyway, i just seriously don't know what to do!!!
i feel like a star fish under a rock!!!
it's comfortable for me coz it's my house,
but everyone thinks that i'm gonna die under that rock!!!
it's like he's a killer or something...
everyone's telling me to go away from him...
but i can't coz i love him...
i can't talk about him with anyone...
whenever i do that, they just say, "he's such a jerk!!!"
it makes me feel really sad whenever people do that to him!!!
that's why i'm writing it down...
i don't have to tell other people about it...
i just have to keep typing...
sometimes i feel like i'm the only one on earth...
i sometimes feel so lonely and sad...
whenever i think about him,
sometimes i smile, but sometimes i cry...
i smile coz of the things he did before...
all of them...
the things that can make my stomach feel weird...
i cry coz i miss him so much...
i cry coz i can't tell anyone how much i love him...
i can't even tell him coz he won't give me the answer i would want...
i guess i have to risk rejection...
but i don't want to...
he won't take me seriously...
he'd probably laugh at my face thinking i'm just joking...
(sigh...)
sometimes, i just wanna burst ito tears and scream my throat out!!!
i just feel that i have no one to depend on!!!
everyone thinks i have no problems at all,
they think i'm just this happy and jolly person in happy-jolly land!!!
but whenever i go home, and whenever i'm alone in my room,
i look into space to think about stuff about him...
to exercise my brain a little bit...
i just don't know what to do anymore...
i don't know how i'm gonna defend him anymore...
why does everyone hate him anyway?!!!
he's not doing anything to you guys...
you guys just think too much about him...
he might've done stupid stuff,but we all have...
anyway, enough about defending him...
i just wanna figure out how i'm gonna see him...
he's so far way...
he's on the other side of the globe...
i guess we'll just leave it like that...
i guess we'll just let it be gone...
i guess i'll just stop thinking about him...
i guess i'll just stop missing him...
but i can't coz i love him...

stupid!!!

A while ago, I was dumb...
Now... I'm smart!!!

A while ago, I was fat...
Now... I'm thin!!!

A while ago, I was ugly...
Now... I'm pretty!!!

A while ago, I was sick...
Now... I'm healed!!!

A while ago, I didn't know how to love...
Now... I know that love is the only thing I need!!!

If you think this way, you're
stupid!!!
No one can change just like
that!!!
How stupid can you
get?!!

quotes...

"You don't marry someone you can live with, you
marry the person who you cannot live without." - unknown

"Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes
all things, endures all things." - The Bible : 1 Corinthians

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy,
it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it
is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in
evilbut rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always
hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." - The Bible : 1 Corinthians
13:4

"If you have it [love], you don't need to have
anything else. If you don't have it, it doesn't matter much what else you do
have." - Sir James M. Barrie

"Who knows where the road will lead us, only a
fool would say, but if you let me love you, I'm sure to love you all the way." -
From the song "All The Way" -(by Frank Sinatra)

nice quote #2

I saw this quote in Anna L.'s blog... (http://www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=sh0ppah0lic_purpleice) It says there she got it from Aleia's blog, so yeah... (http://www.xanga.com/aliya_7621)

I know as long as you're
happy I can get through this, but it still kills me to see you
with her... Not because she's perfect for you... Not because she makes you
smile... Not because she's what you need... but because she's my
bestfriend...

ouchy ouch!!! :(

nice quote bestfriend!!!

I just wanna share to the world this quote by my bestfriend, Roselle!!! I saw it in her blog (http://rochie----.blogspot.com)

No guy or girl is worth your tears,
and the one who is, won't make
you cry...ü

hehehehe!!! lab yah bestfriend!!!

you bragging piece of crap!!!

Just because you're rich
it doesn't mean you can buy everything!

Just because you're so fine-looking
it doesn't mean you can't have pimples!

Just because you're so talented
it doesn't mean you can't sink!

Just because you have so many friends
it doesn't mean they don't talk behind your back!

Just because you're so boastful
it doesn't mean I don't love you!

reply to the perfectionist...

Why did you have to ask why I liked you?

I liked you because you didn't know how to react on my corny jokes...

I liked you because you said I had a fat nose...

I liked you because you didn't care about what other people thought...

I liked you because you said I wasn't perfect...

I liked you because, in my eyes, I can't
think of anyone as perfect as you in my life...

hugs and kisses...

All I need is just a small hug...

A hug that I can remember until the day I die,
A hug that can remind me how much you care about me,
A hug that can remind you of me,
A hug that defines our relationship,
A hug that everyone wants...

All I need is just a little kiss...

A kiss that can destroy our friendship,
A kiss that can tell you how much I love you,
A kiss that can give me sparks whenever I remember it,
A kiss that goes beyond the laws of physics,
A kiss that everyone wants...

I finally got both of them, but I'm still
not in a bliss...

are you blind?!

Can't you see me?
I'm always here!

Why do you always talk to her?
I'm here!

Why do you always talk about her?
I'm here!

Why do you sing with her?
I'm here!

Why do you hug her?
I'm here!

Why do you like her?
I'm here!

You may think I'm invisible, but
I'm here!

pointless poem... - requested by francis

"Poems are for stupid people like you," my friend said...
"No, it's not!!! You're just saying that because you don't write!" I replied defensively
"Of course, I don't!!! I'm not stupid like you!!!"
I sat there looking so embarrassed about the arguement...

confused...

I'm so confused!
Do I like him or the other one?

He is really nice and sweet, but he's insensitive,
The other one is really smart and sensitive, but doesn't have manners.

He is talented, but he's boastful about it,
The other one is also talented, but he's humble about it.

He is jealous of the other one whenever the other one talks to me,
The other one likes someone else.

He hugs me whenever he misses me,
The other one hugs me when he feels like it.

Whenever he looks into my eyes, he smiles and covers his face,
Whenever the other one looks into my eyes, he laughs and says I have a crush on him.

I finally chose him,
but
yet...
I'm still confused!

perfectionist...

He's really nice and sweet,
yet he's not perfect
He's a musician (which I like),
yet he's not perfect
He hugs me all the time and says, "I miss you",
yet he's not perfect
He looks at me and sees my soul,
yet he's not perfect
I finally asked why he loves me, and he replied,

"I love you because you're not perfect..."