guess what? i couldn't... i didn't...

racquel would always say, "he cares about you kaya!!!"
and ivanna would always agree with her...

i seriously don't know what to reply to them whenever we have this conversation...
i mean i know he does, but then i don't know how it really feels to be cared by him...
"ok," is the only reply i can say...

i realized that i seriously miss him now...
even if we see each other in school, it's just not enough...

i wanna talk to him, but i have nothing to say...
ivanna was right!
i can't say anything to him 'coz he's the only person i think of...
it's not like i can talk about him with him...

i read this story that made me think:

min-min (girl) likes din-din (guy)...
for so many years, they've been friends...
but now, they're nothing...
in those years, their friendship or love were fading...
way before, they would look at each other and not say a word and just smile...
din-din liked min-min...
then something happened...
after that, they would just hug for no reason...
then something happened...
after that, they were a little awkward already...
now, they're absolutely nothing...
they would see each other and they would always pretend that there's nothing wrong...
but there is...
they can't talk because there's nothing to say...
they can't hug because there's no time and there's no reason to...
they can't do anything...
what happened to them?

i talked to racquel about this story...
i talked to ivanna, too...
i was even crying...
i just missed him, and i could relate to the story...

i wish i just didn't do those things that i did...
i wish i could turn back time, and just hugged him forever...
i wish i could just talk to him, and not say a word...
i wish i could do all these things,

but guess what?
i couldn't... i didn't...